14 October 2009

The Birthday Truck

Lame is the term I have borrowed from a younger generation to describe some of the ineffective, cloying attempts I have made at entertaining my radio audiences. Today I recall one of the primary examples. 

In September of 1990 I was paired with a co-host against my will, mainly. I had worked solo almost exclusively up until that point. I felt it was a bad idea from the inception that I share my show with a newbie with a natural gift of gab named Angie Mabry.

Her easy acclimation to radio made the forced pairing much more tolerable. We seemed to mix well on the air and off. Our station owner/general manager introduced our duo on the daily half hour Swap Shop program with the intention of expanding her role as eventual morning show co-host.

We went to work in numerous procrastinating planning sessions trying to conceptualize what the new morning show would sound like. Our boss grew weary of our preliminaries and finally compelled us to begin the 6 am to 9:30 am program at the beginning of November. What we settled on was an emphasis on fluff talk and downplayed our music format which we perceived appeasing the “blue hairs”, our undesired elderly demographic. Most of our style was modeled after the secular morning zoo shows of the day but stopped short and we were limited by our aging southern audience and their obsolete traditions. As far as I have known no attempt had ever been made on a southern gospel station for such a show so our new enterprise was in uncharted waters amidst the brokered religious programs keeping us afloat.

One of the most memorable episodes of Mabry and O’Neal show was the Birthday Truck. My on-air partner feigned anxiety over her November 13th birthday as the event neared. Her day was hyped over a week or so around the office and on the air. By the 14th the semi bringing a mountain of gifts was a day late and Mabry was “worried.” The birthday bit climaxed with a visit from the red-neck truck driver (voiced by me) who had troubles finding the station and struck her parked Honda Prelude while pulling into our tiny parking lot. The skit was more lame than anything on Saturday Night Live, pretty bad.

We had some chemistry. We were both in our mid twenties sharing similar views. I skewed a little more conservative. Our ad libs were much more entertaining than the prepared text we thought was funny. Interactions with our sports & news director, Fred Brewer fared much better. He had a dry poignant humor that would have been a better match for a morning show. Our boss saw things differently favoring a male female duo. Had the show been played straight with unforced comedy lacking in phony laughter we might have had a hit. We simply tried too hard.

  The best conversations were the real ones involving our friendly UGA and Georgia Tech football rivalry. I was the long time Dawgs fan while she preferred the Yellow Jackets. To her credit Tech had the superior squad and was national champs that year. For some inexplicable reason sports coverage on a southern gospel station was considered taboo by listeners so the best element of our show seemed too secular. The outspoken Southern Baptist and Pentecostal based audience was resistant. We were viewed as sell outs. Our 2,500 watt AM signal disappeared into the haze that was too far on the fringe of the Atlanta environs to be competitive in the major market so our locals won in the end.

I don’t recall the show lasting much past the new year. The partnership ended on a sour note, I don’t remember the precise circumstances but our radio savvy sales manager “Just” Janet Barcus  played Mabry’s understudy and eventual replacement as the curtain fell on my third radio home in February of ‘91. Click on the Mp3 below for the Birthday Truck aircheck...


The station now has a 50,000 watt construction permit that is wasted on the same old format with a playlist of obscure southern gospel tailored to those born sometime during the Civil War. Their signal reaches further now though. I don’t believe the current owners wish to program for the major market they now cover. What a shame.
Stay tuned.

01 October 2009

Welcome to the Future

It’s funny how the idea for this post came to me right before I hear a new Country song with the exact same concept and title by Brad Paisley that has been percolating in my own brain for the past several weeks. I have had 43 wonderful years on this planet and I see the time we live in right now, technologically, is the best in history. Personally, I have carried the past around like a golden god not realizing that now is the best time to be alive. Forget recessions and floods, today is where I need to be not trapped in some nostalgia hell like an 80 year old. Yes there were good times and I will continue to recall them in posts.

We are living in a world that the Jetsons would envy. Our society has advanced in the last 25 years at a pace more rapid than the quarter century that preceded it. Compare and contrast 1960 through 1985 politically, socially, technologically, and artistically. Changes and advancements were made just not as rapidly. The focus of this blog is art and tech so I won’t stray too far. In 1985 I was still using the same stereo Lp for music that my dad used in 1960. In ‘85 the compact disc was new having been introduced to the marketplace Christmas of 1982. It was the age of Reganomics an the birth of Mtv.  I was a teenager full of wonder but never dreamed of how the future would unfold.

This present generation has all but abandoned the CD and other physical music media for downloads from Internet sources both legal and otherwise. Not to mention what all we can do with our cellular phones. This was a device that resembled a brick a generation ago. We are using our tiny cell phones now for everything; Web surfing, video, music, texting, games, the list is endless. We do everything with these devices except make a phone call, it seems.

The downside of living today is that I believe we have lost some of our humanity. We have substituted Email and social websites for actual human contact. In the process we are much more rude less evolved and dumbed downed in the absence of more “primitive” communication. Don’t get me started on the atrocious grammar and spelling I see on the Internet. When was the last time you wrote an actual letter with a pen and paper? Thought so. Well, we’re here, Welcome to the Future.
Stay tuned.

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